Personal Responsibility,and You

Have we as people lost the ability to feel shame, or, perhaps, practice a bit of introspection every now and then? We whine incessantly about the unfair aspects of our lives,and never stop and think,"Hey, you know what,I'm approaching this wrong."

No, of course we can't do that. It seems far too difficult to take responsibility,and change your approach, perception, or actions. However, in actuality, it's easier to change yourself, than to change the things that you blame. Let's meet some hypothetical friends, shall we?

Meet Sally: Sally decides that her boyfriend Joe is just the most amazing man. She's one year away from graduating high school. Sure, Joe get's high with his friends,and is failing classes, but he is just sooooo "perfect". Sally ends up pregnant,and then decides to move in with Joe. She then proceeds to complain about how lazy he is,and about how he never helps with the new baby. She claims that she had bad luck. That's why she's on assistance,and living with a loser.


So, who's at fault here? I didn't see "luck" ruining Sally's life. I saw Sally ruining Sally's life. She made one poor decision after another.


Meet Gary: Gary loves attractive women. He is easily distracted by a shapely body,and big breasts. He hangs out at places where he's bound to find attractive and spoiled females. He spends little time getting to know them. He spends a great deal of money buying them things,and spoiling them with attention. The women take advantage of Gary,and he ends up hating women. He assumes that all women are like this,and spends his time being bitter,and spreading misogynistic views.

Who is to blame? Gary chose to seek vapid,shallow, spoiled females. He allows his perception of an entire gender to be shaped by the women he CHOSE to be around. Had he used his mind, he would have looked elsewhere. He would have also ended up a lot happier,and saved quite a bit of money. Yet, it's easier for him to become bitter,and blame females.



We need to be able to view the world beyond our noses. A life driven by narcissism is bound to end up an unhappy one. Your childhood can help shape who you are,but, ultimately, life's choices are up to you to make. Toss away the crutches of blame that you may use,and learn to be responsible for your actions. If you make poor choices, remember, you can always reevaluate your decisions,and work your way out of the situation.